Where in UCCX do I see which server is the active IP Phone Agent?
The IPPA service is active on both but only servicing clients on the node that has mastership. You can see this under Servicability > Control Center. There will be a blue box with the letter M in it next to the services.
To achieve a single Phone Service URL you need a third-party load balancer that makes the node choice based on the XML response. There is no way to achieve this natively.
PS- Posting this question to the Contact Center community would have resulted in a much faster response. This is hiding in Video over IP.
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